Saturday, November 27, 2010

Near Homelessness! Do nice people finish last?

Glory to God! You know I am in a very fragile place in my heart. I recently told my husband I am tired of being the "nice Christian" because nice people finish last. People think you don't know or don't have a clue what they have done or what is in their hearts. He turned to me and said "don't stop being who you are."

So as I revealed a touch of what I went through when I left my home and relocated to Charlotte, NC I had to think it through. It was my best friend that paid for my hotel stay as I was trying to get my thoughts together. It was the church who continued to take care of my hotel stay as I was going through. Then it was a stranger that rented me a place "the place that only God himself had prepared for us." He whispered it to me in scripture "I have prepared a place for you." John 14:1-2

So there are people that God used along my way through the storms. You see I like My mother had put people up when they were in need and they turned their back when they thought I needed but Thank God I knew He was my source.

When my mom was dying not a soul had the heart to take her in. They did quite the contrary they did whatever they could to make her uncomfortable and she shared before her death. So in my heart I was in shock to hear the very person she took in from domestic violence spew "she was not willing to deal with her." I thought wow this is family. It occurred to me then that family is a state of mind. It is a state of being family. It was then that I realized it's okay because Mom is my family and I will do my best to take care of her.

So as I am presented once again with the issues of family verses "family" I spew I will not be a fool, but I will hold on to my love for people and for Christ. I will do what is best for my family. Best does not always mean giving them what they want. Sometimes what is best is giving them the truth. The truth that I know the real truth behind it all.

God has reminded me that there is a time for everything. He said "David was not nice when he told Goliath he would cut off his head." He also revealed that when Joseph was mistreated he handled the situation with care. Keep me in prayer Saints as I rise above the storm armed with Gods love.

© 2010 Denise Loundes-Russell

Thursday, November 25, 2010

So Grateful and Thankful To God to be among the Land of the Living!

I woke up reflecting on so much to be grateful for! I am so grateful for my husband, my 5 beautiful healthy children. My extended family and my friends. I am even grateful for strangers along the way.

I am grateful I had a church to go to last night. I am grateful for his message on wearing the garment of Praise. I woke up feeling relieved because although Thanksgiving is usually really hard for me. This morning I reflected on the fact that Mom died pleased with me. She said "Thank you for leading a clean life, she said it shows in your children, your family and even in your child birth." She said "you took in what I tried to give."At the time I was like huh? But I now realize she was sharing so much with me to let me know she was happy with me.

She further said "Thank you that when you gave me money or anything you never sought it in return." I said "how could I when you did so much for us." She said" Well, I was not perfect." I said "you know Mom there are children who never make it home." "There are children whose Mom left them and never thought a second thought." "But you did more than enough, for all of us." "You were there." "If you did not do anything but feed us, you did enough."

That is how I feel about the Almighty God this morning. If he does nothing else for you hasn't he done enough? He woke us up and even if we just breathe his wonderful air he has done enough. If you can go for a walk with your family, he has done enough. If we have food to eat today or even if we don't your breathing, so he has done enough. If you trust him he will provide because his name is Provider.

What I have learned throughout the years is no matter where I am, I am simply Thankful to God because I may not be where I want to be but I still have the chance to get there. It will only get better and better if you continue to believe! If he did it for least of them will he not do it for you?

Enjoy this holiday season and every day knowing how blessed you truly are to be among the land of the living!


© 2010 Denise Loundes-Russell

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Great King Your Greatness Comes from Within!

Arise my King, no more slumber, nor more sleeping, no more rest!
It is time to put your skills to the test.
Joseph struggled in life too you see!
Before he had the strength to become who God created him to be.
The system was created to slow you down indeed.
But God had already planted the seed.
The seed of greatness lies within.
To see you not prosper is such a great sin.
Yes, there are those in position pulling strings know.
It hurts for they did not want your seed to grow.
But you...... it is you..... who must know and then the manifestation will begin.
The greatness you already bask in!
You my King will definitely Overcome and Win!
Great King Your Greatness Comes From Within!

© 2010 Denise Loundes-Russell

Sunday, November 21, 2010

No Pharisees! I need Gods Love in My life! Agape!

The greatest lesson I have learned in my love life is Gods love is never changing. I do not need people who change like the wind. I need people who are truly made in the image of God. You see God is never changing. He doesn't love you when you do everything right and stop loving you when he knows you got something wrong. I want truly God like people surrounding my children who understand them and truly understand God. The scripture that has been on my heart is Hebrews 13:8 "Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever."

The reason the compliment my son received the other day was so important to me was because he said "your son never changed" he thought it was an act because we meet wishy washy people all too often who call themselves Christian. It helped me understand why Jesus chose the disciples he chose, they were not the classic perfect people they were real! As my mother would say they had problems but they were loyal. We never knew the name of the Pharisee but we knew the name of Thomas. As bad as people say he was Jesus felt we needed to know the names of the people who were real, they were significant and he still wanted us to remember their name.

My mother always said you need the good, the bad and the indifferent. You see she was saying don't limit yourself to any group of people. For you will find Christ like people everywhere you go. Some times non Christians can be more Christ like simply because of their character, so when I say Christ like I truly mean people of character who are the same who don't change with the wind. That is the characteristics I want poured into my children.

If I understood anything during my trials it was that God was answering my prayers that he remove those around me who were not true and I am grateful that he showed me my Christ like people that I can depend on. Much love to you my circle of family and friends who are always there and remain true!

As I was listening to the trials of Tiger Woods, Tye Tribett and others I am thinking God they erred but who are we to keep them under condemnation? I totally understand Gods frustration with the Pharisee. The Pharisee is consumed with looking good and not about being real and true. So when you mistreat people or stand in judgement of others remember your character is truly on display too! I believe that is the purpose of the scripture Matthew 7:1 “Do not judge, or you too will be judged." to be a reminder to us that we all sin and fall short of the glory of God! Romans 3:23

© 2010 Denise Loundes-Russell

Friday, November 19, 2010

Outstanding Job Justice on

I am loving what God is doing. My son has truly been used to keep my younger ones busy and learning and I love it! He won the Superkids $25.00 gift card to Chick Fil- A last month for playing Superbook and was blessed with a baseball cap, a DVD and the game cards as well. He even had pleasant buyers for his calendar promo for the month! Thank you so much for supporting his site!

This month he has been growing his site I love the new Eagles Book Reading Club and the library linking you to the artist at Youtube. It has been great to keep my children focused on good songs that feed their spirit.

© 2010 Denise Loundes-Russell

Awards, Awards, Awards! Gods Goodness is Simply Amazing!

I must say this has been an amazing week of award ceremonies and honors. Victor was awarded Terrific Kid and had Coach Q who was mentored by Bill Cosby come to his school to present his awards. Taylor missed A honor roll by points in Social Studies but she made the honor roll and Mikey made the honor roll. My home schooled child missed honor roll by one class Spanish. He thinks I am too hard and I make him write too much but it is a skill he has a gift for and must master. He also has to realize just because I am Mom does not make me easy. I even got great news........ I can not quite share yet but know that prayer was a Daniel prayer held up but finally manifested.

I have thoroughly enjoyed my seniors amazing opportunities that have come his way. I must say I am so grateful to his mentors, coaches and his Dad for being there for him every step of the way. Last night, I attended his awards ceremony and he received his football award and such kind compliments. One coach said "wow you and your husband have done a great job, I have never met such a nice young man." He said "I thought it was an act but he never changed." He said "there are days when I come to school.... and it is nice to be greeted by a student who is always so polite." He said "I know he will be successful just based on who he has shown himself to be." That meant so much to us, it made us realize that no matter how difficult it can get the reward is so much greater.

For the past few months his mentors have sent him gifts, passes to games and have offered to take him to games even this weekend. My sister and nephew even sent them to Carowinds. It has been a true testimony of How Great God is and how much he touches the hearts of man for our children.

I am so grateful to God for even sending me such wonderful people this week who have just continued to remind me of how great God created me to be. Even a possible disaster turned into me being blessed with a new jacuzzi.

When I heard the kind and awesome compliments for each of my children, I could not help but rejoice for the breakthrough. I always knew Victor was great and his teacher simply confirmed his greatness today when she selected him as a terrific Kid for the month of November and said what a joy he has been. I am glad that God has matched him and connected him with someone who appears to be warm, kind and loving just like him.

So thank you all for keeping them in prayer and know that your prayers are being answered in such a great and mighty way! May God send tremendous blessings for each of you and your families!

© 2010 Denise Loundes-Russell

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Explosive Service that has truly effected My Life!

In the last few years I have promised myself that I want to be Good not look Good. So I have gone through the motions of religion waiting for the right moment and Saturday night I finally heard what I needed to hear. I had a friend that invited me to her church because she knew I was living to the rules to the best of my ability but she knew I longed to feel God's love once again.

I went to her church and from the door to my seat, I was greeted with smiling faces and such warmth. It was very admirable to say the least. However, what blew me away was his message. He said "we are one step from losing a generation for Christ and we are one step from winning a generation that is on fire for Christ." That is what is wrong. He said we have people telling us the rules but are they showing you the love of Christ?

I was in awe because that is where my heart was. I have been asking for sometime what happens after they go to the pulpit? I wanted to know are we showing people Christ or are we just getting them acquainted with Christ and leaving them to figure out the rest.

This Pastor was so grateful for the people who showed him Christ. I could identify because my mother showed me Christ. Even though I never understood where she found the energy to take trains to feed others when she was a single mom raising children and working 2- 3 jobs. I knew she had to have a love for people that was indescribable. I knew that she had us at the nursing home almost every weekend sitting with the elderly and helping them. I knew she had us in church every time the doors opened. I knew that she had Jesus on the inside of her to love like she did.

I wanted so badly to be able to do what she did for others. Some how my light dimmed and life took control. I had lost some thing, I knew that I was no longer on fire for God like I wanted to be and this service ignited something in me I had not felt in a really long time. So when I returned to service Sunday night it was equally connected to the message being preached at my church that I had not been speaking the power of his word like I should. I had not been throwing the rock like David. I was no longer on fire so how could I be effective?

© 2010 Denise Loundes-Russell

Thomas was so loved by God and by me!

You know we have a tendency to take the scripture "speak things as though they were" too far. I believe God loved Thomas for who he was and his unbelief because if Thomas did not question things we would not have such vivid evidence of his presence.

I was recently thinking about the things I have been through and others who have suffered at the adage that we have to pretend nothing is wrong to be holy. As I went through my silent pain as a head injury patient. I went from not being able to remember my name to remembering some things to years later almost remembering everything. Yet still not recalling all the details of the accident.

However, during that period everyone kept telling me nothing is wrong and physically I was healed but mentally I was fighting for my thoughts. I was the only one who knew what I was feeling. The torment I felt was horrible, when my husband or children would say remember this and I would draw a blank and look in embarrassment because I could not recall important family memories. Then there were people I once knew speaking to me on Facebook and I had no clue who they were.

My mind was very sharp before the accident. There was hardly a word I could not spell or a fact I could not recall. However, after the accident I became more dependent on my computer but some things not even the computer could recall and it was then that I had to call on my creator and ask that he heal my mind.

When my mother died I was particularly angry because my family allowed me to take on a task I should have never been entrusted with. I was angry they were too busy with their comfort to take time to care for a woman who had cared for all of them.

I was angry because they knew I had suffered a head injury months before and my mind was in no condition to make decisions. I was like putty in my mothers hands and had reverted back to a little girl in her presence. In my final plea for help no one showed that Monday and it made me despise the term family even more. I felt like if they treated a woman who had been there for them like this, then what would they do to me. I felt like the word family meant nothing at that time in my life. We were given ten days to save Mom and I felt we had all let her down.

So as I walked away from the house my mom had practically died in and I decided to start over I was very much in a very bad place mentally. Not a good place with a family of seven to care for. It was as if in all my craziness there was still no one willing to make sound decisions and my grief had to take a back burner and I just had to deal with it. I finally understood why people become homeless and I almost caused my entire family to be homeless because I no longer had the fight in me I once had. I gave up the home, the car, the driver license and anything else that could expire did.

I was still recovering from the head injury, six months later I was dealing with my moms death. Three months later the Devil had thrown a new issue my way which was the assault on my son. Then to add insult to injury, ten months later I managed to try to blow the leaves in the yard and the cover came off of the blower and sucked my hand in. The doctors wanted to take the hanging finger tips off. I pleaded that I needed my fingers because my profession was a court reporter and so they decided I had to keep my finger tips to type and they stitched my fingers. This of course I felt was the worst two years of my life. I couldn't even fight Sears so they got away with the worst settlement in history!

However, what kept me was knowing that God had saved my life, he had healed my hands and he had saved my son from what the enemy meant for evil. God had turned it all around for my good. You see my pain did not go away because I pretended it did not exist it began to go away when I began to bring it to my father in prayer and deal with my pain. So I like Thomas wanted to know what was wrong and wanted to see the turn around in order to be a true testimony!

© 2010 Denise Loundes-Russell

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Certain Gratitude!

My heart is filled with joy. As I write I often think of the people I write about. In this particular case it was my husband. I said does it bother you when I write about the things we have been through? His answer to me "was sometimes." "However, I want you to write from your heart so that it will help us and one day help others." It takes a great man to allow you to write your personal issues and just keep going. So this morning I arose with such a grateful heart that I have a husband and family that loves me enough to allow me to be free to express myself from the heart!

© 2010 Denise Loundes-Russell

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Poem to My First Born Son!

"Football made you stand tall,
and I am excited you answered the call.
The call to be great, to be free!
Free to be who God wanted you to be.
Victory is a decision from a vision.
It's not our fate to be in this condition.
God built us to be Great Kings & Queens.
To be united like the greatest teams!
Let them remember your sting!
Reign Victorious Great King!

© 2010 Denise Loundes-Russell