Being alone was never something I struggled with. At an early age my Momma taught us that "not everybody is going to like you and that is okay." I grew up facing a lot of envy and developed a thick skin. I have to constantly ask God to create in me a pure heart and a renewed mind. I know I have things I have to deal with. However, I will not spend my days chasing after people and worrying about why they are holding a grudge or why they are mad that God said "My family will be blessed". I trust that God knows just what he is doing.
I have found that in our culture in particular we can not depend on man for support when God sends a public decree on your life ....so if it comes wonderful but if it doesn't I am just fine flying like an Eagle and quietly taking those with me who want to go. I prayed for some things that I didn't need in 2014. I was specific about working in a call center environment, because I allowed someone to whisper in my ear how we need traditional means. I had lost faith that God was going to handle my situation in a supernatural way. He handled my situation nonetheless and he granted my request. He still took excellent care of me but he let me know I had leaned to my own understanding and slightly messed things up. However, I am eternally grateful for revelation and for understanding. He was my Strong Tower, I ran in and he took care of my needs. If He used you as a vessel I promise you He will always repay that debt.
I am going into 2015 with a pure heart and a renewed mind and I am not willing to let anyone bring their mess into my life. I love you all and I wish you much success but I am letting go of some people and nonsense and I am moving forward in the things God promised me long ago. Please don't feel like you are the reason for my Blessing because like Pastor said Sunday the man of God said "I want nothing from you, it is God and God only that has blessed me." I am not listening to the haters spewing hatred about how God is going to hold anything up, because that's not what He promised. "He promised me my latter would be better than my beginning, he promised me that my children's children would be Blessed." I stand on that word. I trust God will do exactly what his word said. I will repent and jump over that hurdle.
I therefore, stand before you in love declaring that my publishing company will open in 2015 and I will do the work of the Lord. I stopped writing for others because certain organizations attempted to change the clause that I would have the full rights to my writing and when I began writing the promise was that my royalties would even go on to my heirs. I then began to write and it seemed like the editors were going to change what I wrote more than what I wanted because that is what editors do but when I write my intent is to write in love and for God. I know that I have allowed fear to hold me back for sometime now. I have allowed disappointment to reign.
However, in 2015 I declare and decree that nothing will hold me back from walking in what God has ordained. I was blessed with the gift of discernment and so if you see me staying out of your way it's because I see both of your faces and I am giving you time to deal with that other face. I can't cater to your desire to have everyone flock at your feet and unfortunately that is not my gift. I have never been good in kissing up to get where I have to go. God has always made a way for my light to shine, nonetheless in other ways; that is why management never appealed to me no matter how much it is offered. I find myself not wanting to position myself to be in a position of compromising my beliefs to suit a company or an entity. I would much rather live my life being able to stand up for people and for myself. I don't always go about it in the best way but know I am a work in progress and praying daily that God will work it all out.
Be Blessed because I really do have nothing but love for even my haters and those with two faces. I am praying daily that God will help you as I am praying that he will show me...me. I wish you all much love and success in 2015. Even if I have to fly solo, I will serve God with all my heart and fly alone. I will accomplish that which God promised me from long ago.I am grateful for a truly discerning Pastor as well and everything he has said he could have only received it from God for it confirmed everything God has said in the past, that is why I know His will, will surely be done, I now have a confidence that I can carry this out with the help of the Almighty God.
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